New for 2014, Kittiwake One will feature Wi-Fi internet access. To clarify further, this means you can browse that thing they call the Internet (or World Wide Web) while you’re staying here. Widespread internet access is a very recent phenomenon so we don’t expect you to be an expert immediately. It is with this in mind that we’ve written this guide.

Becoming a Digital Native

In the table below you will find things you may currently do in and around Kittiwake One next to the corresponding digital version of the same behaviour.
 
If you currently... You can now...
Look out of the window to check the surf. Visit www.eyeballhq.tv to check all the local beaches for the next few days.
Consult the Kittiwake One tide clock to check the local tides. Visit www.magicseaweed.com to check the tides for every beach in the world. Ever.
Look out of the window to check the current weather. Consult your weather app. To ensure an accurate reading, consult a second weather app. If they match, everything is fine but if they don’t, find a third weather app to consult.
Open up the Trivial Pursuit and Scrabble sets at Kittiwake One to pass the time playing against your friends. Download the Trivial Pursuit and Scrabble apps and pass the time playing against somebody else’s friends.
Switch on the TV and flick through the channels to decide what to watch. Check your Sky app. Then your BBC iPlayer app. Then your 4OD, ITV and Channel 5 apps before going back to the Sky app and repeating it all again.
Enjoy a good conversation with your partner or travel companion. Sit next to your partner while checking Facebook. Now scroll back up and check it all over again. You can never be too careful because somebody else may be having some fun they haven’t told you about.
Read an entire issue of National Geographic from the bookshelf at Kittiwake One. Download the latest episode of National Geographic on your iPad. Be blown away by the animated cover and immediately investing in a subscription. All before getting to the contents page.
Experience something funny and roll around on the floor laughing your ass off, before finally recovering once the funny incident is over. Experience something funny and then update your Twitter and Facebook statuses to ‘RAOTFLMAO’.
Ask somebody how to get down to the beach. Or just use your eyes and brain to figure it out. Fire up Google Maps and use the satellite view to find your way down there. Hum the Mission Impossible theme tune as you do this for a deeper and longer lasting effect.
Buy and send a postcard to your closest friends using a real postage stamp and the quaint village Post Office in Morthoe Take a picture of the sunset and upload it to Facebook with a witty-or-meaningful-but-rarely-personalised-comment for all of your friends to see, including the weird guy from school you haven’t spoken to in 20 years.
Ask around for a local restaurant recommendation. Google the phrase ‘good restaurants in Woolacombe’ before deciding where to eat based upon the views of a bunch of people you’ve never met.
Invite all your friends round to give them a detailed review of your holiday at Kittiwake One. Write a Tripadvisor review before you leave.
Wonder what’s going on at work while you’re enjoying some time off. Check your emails incessantly and never really relax.

As you can see the Internet is a limited, dangerous, misleading place. We don’t think it will catch on but it’s there at Kittiwake One if you want to use it. You have been warned.


Blog header image Map by DrButtsMD
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